5 Simple Steps For Overcoming Fear and Anxiety

You Are Not Alone!

Have you been experiencing more fear and anxiety than normal?  Not necessarily about performance or achieving goals, but an overwhelming fear of the unknown?  If you are experiencing this, you are most certainly NOT alone.  So much in life is shifting right now and the control over our future feels like it’s dwindling.  The good news is that even if we can’t control the uncontrollable, we can certainly understand what exactly we are currently afraid of, pinpoint the actions or times when we are feeling the MOST afraid, and change our behavior to be more calm, confident and courageous!

Step #1 – Write Down What Is Keeping You Up At Night

We all have those fears and worries that are constantly entering our brain and endlessly swirling around.  Whether it’s keeping you up at 3 AM while you toss and turn and can’t go back to sleep or every morning as you scroll your news feed.  Write down what you are fearful of or worry about.  And just know it’s ok to have A LOT of fears during this time.

Step #2 – Come Up With A Plan Or Action Steps For Each Fear

Now we need to turn that problem (fear) into a solution (action steps).  Write down all of the things you would actually need to do if that fear really happened.  You might actually discover that your fear might not be so bad after all because you have come up with a plan.  For instance, your biggest fear right now may be losing your job.  Your action steps might be 1) update resume 2) research companies that need what you have to offer 3) identify people in your network to connect you with those companies 4) apply for a new job.  While losing your job could be terrible, you may realize that there are several companies just like the one you work for that would be lucky to hire you.  You may also realize that with the skillset you have, you can work anywhere and that there may be a BETTER job than the one you currently have.  Now that you have a solution, each time that fear pops up, remind yourself that you can only control what you can control, and if this happens, “I HAVE A SOLUTION!”

Step #3 – Recognize What Is Triggering Your Fear

Being able to identify WHEN your fear is creeping in or when it is at its worst is just as important as knowing WHAT your actual fear is.  Does your stomach clench up when you talk about COVID with your friends? Does your heart beat fast when you are scrolling through your social media feed?  Do you get overly angry when you see people making other choices than you would make?  Do you lose focus and does your mind wander when reading important documents?   Write down all of these situations and also what you are “feeling.”

Step #4 – Change Your Behavior

Now that you have recognized that situations that trigger your fear and anxiety you need to stop, then change direction.  Write down the different options you have when these feelings arise during these situations.  For instance, if you get angry and your muscles start to tense up as you read the news, can you stop reading, put it down and grab a glass of water.  Not only are you eliminating your negative behavior but you are changing direction with positive behavior.  This is the hardest thing to change as it might eliminate part of a familiar routine.  But trust me, once you make the change you will notice your fear and anxiety drastically reduce.

Step #5 – Breathe Deeper And Add More Movement Into Your Day

The above 4 steps may take some time to identify, figure out, and change - don’t be hard on yourself if it doesn’t happen overnight!  Once you master them I also encourage you to add in or increase deep breathing exercises into your day (6-second count in, 7-second count out) and also getting up and walking around more often.  I try to breathe deeply for 1 minute and walk around and/or stretch for 1 minute every single hour I am awake.  It helps me focus more, lower my heart rate, feel more relaxed, and get those endorphins going to elevate my happiness.

I hope these steps help you as much as they have helped me.  I first learned of them early in my athletic career and they helped me overcome my fear of failure.  But I’ve also found them to be extremely helpful in uncertain times, like now, as they give me the ability to make important decisions as a business owner, as a Mom, as a wife, and as a productive member of my community, without the obstacle of fear!